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| This is just to remind me about what I want to write about.
Ezra's inspiration last year --- > police officer. Coincidence?
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| Well I've got myself a new toy. An account with iTunes.
I've found lots of the good old stuff I'm in love with, though I won't
mention names since it might deminish the formidable manliness that I
virtually ooze. Now to move on from sarcasm...
I had a conversation with a dear friend concerning celibacy and
basically came to the conclusion that I need to do more research.
I need to talk to someone who is actually doing it. I've also
decided that I really do want to become a cop.
I'll still go for a college degree in biz, but I don't like the biz
world enough to stay in it and deal with all the smug panzies.
I'm reading a book about spiritual warfare my roomie gave me. It
makes me want to do battle. Bring on the next day, I'm ready to
stab it or shoot it or something. Yay for enthusiasm.
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| I saw The Passion of the Christ for the second time and cried more this
time than before. I'd like to think that this is why my heart
feels so heavy despite all my friends being around, but I find it hard
to lie to myself when I know I'm doing it.
The issue of celibacy is what weighs on my heart. I've come so
far from those days not too long ago when my heart was encased in hate
and hurt. Now I feel that I might be called by the Father to
forgo the love that was my sole motivation for my blood sweat and tears
spent to get where I am this day. Perhaps the lesson in this is
that wordly love only has so much value. But I can only see it as
the Lord calling me to a life of lonely nights and quiet dinners where
I imagined sleeping beside a beauty beyond words and dinners of soft
smiles and embracing conversation.
Lord, may your will be done and not mine.
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| Where is all of my time spent?
I'm beginning to wonder what I show with how much time I spend on certain things....
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| I'm sure only about two people will know who this is. But that's
fine. I'm bored, and felt like joining this whole blogging
thing. I doubt I'll stay commited and post all the time, but
hopefully as I read friends blogs, I'll remember to update my own.
Life is good at the moment. I only have ... four days left on my
self imposed sabatical from Black Label Society. I'm not quite
sure what I'm going to do when I can listen to them again, come
Tuesday. I might just play all of their cd's straight
through. I just know that I await that day like I used to await
Christmas. Which is rather sad, if you think about it's roots.
I would like to say hello to the beautiful people. That "crew" of
four APU students I hold so dear and those two special families back
home. In addition, the friends that I'm steadily growing closer
to. Also a hi to the denziens of #club and #syndicate, though
they likely won't get this link if I have anything to do with it.
Watched Black Hawk Down with some friends tonight and listened to the
letter that is read at the end of the movie and it hit me pretty
hard. Those inklings of national pride and desire to fight for
some higher cause rose up like river about to flood it's banks. I
don't think those feelings will ever take me into war, but I'm not sure
I'd mind if they did.
With that, I'm going to bed.
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